Many blogs and books have been written about Christianity and the struggles of faith, doubt, and deconstruction from a variety of angles. What space is there for me to share about my own story?
I have read biographies and memoirs about people who have gone from fundamentalism to atheism, from atheism to conservatism, from conservatism to liberalism, and from conservatism to – well – conservatism. As the preacher notes, nothing is new under the sun.
Spoiler alert: my story is more in line with the last – as of now. Part of my interest in starting this blog is an invitation to join me in the process of faith discovery. A faith journey takes a lifetime to complete, and until one’s life is complete there is still time to journey. Who is to say what plot twists or unexpected characters are lurking around the corner?
I have a huge fascination with Christian deconstruction stories, and in full transperancy, part of that fascination is grounded in a quest to find reasons to abandon or alter my faith. This quest is done less out of a desire for change and more out of a curiosity for one simple question: what if I’m wrong? That question inevitablly cascades into others. If I am wrong, how did I get to being wrong? How do I discover what is right? Am I even capable of such a discovery, or will I be stranded on the island of agnosticism?
But then again, what if I’m right? What do I do when my right is somebody else’s wrong?
The questions can go on and on, but alas, I cannot. Questioning is tiring. I am fairly certain that on this well-traveled road that in the end it will be them rather than I who have the final word.
How will this journey culminate? Am I approaching the beginning of my faith’s end? Or is my faith’s beginning nearing its?
